Don’t you carry nothin’……
- January 24th, 2010
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Somewhere between retiring to bed and waking up to an endless loop of Ease On Down The Road stuck in my head, I had this weird dream about shopping for vinyl records. There was a Kitten Machine vinyl that I wanted real bad, but it was like $305. There was a Soulive album there titled Count of Monte Cristo (there is no Soulive album titled Count of Monte Cristo, I have no clue where that came from), the cover art of which was meticulously designed to align with the stars and foretell prophecies of some sort. That particular press was priced at $416, so being the negotiator that I am I bought the somewhat less impressively designed version at the bargain price of $14. How I woke up with Ease On Down The Road stuck in my head I haven’t the foggiest idea, but I will attest here and now that that song gets REAL annoying at 10:00 AM on a Sunday when all you want to do is sleep.
Anyway, that’s not what I came here to write about. I’ve been doing a lot of un-documented thinking lately, which is never a good idea. I’ve been struggling with the idea of self-analysis; how can I step outside myself and look at my situation from an unbiased point of view? How can I be sure that my decisions are made from logic and not from raw emotion? Is it even possible? Is this way too deep for plasticwater.org? All of these are questions I’d rather not answer.
Lately my mood has been like a pensive adagio. I’ve been doing a lot of staring at walls, lost in thought. People are beginning to take this as me finally losing my last bean and slipping into insanity, but I assure you that is inaccurate. At least I think I do. Closer to the truth is that I feel like I’m at some sort of a crossroad, and the choices I make this year are going to be of the utmost importance. I don’t know why this year is special, it just feels that way, and who am I to argue with intangible feelings.
There are things I want, but when confronted with the question of why, I stumble trying to answer. I don’t know why I want the things I do, all I can do is compare it to a feeling of hunger — I feel this way, and to feel better, I know I must eat. But, this is why we don’t go grocery shopping when we’re hungry. We end up with $70 worth of food we don’t want. Time to reflect, analyze. Make good choices.
Come on and, ease on down, ease on down, down the road…….



